Sunday 3 September 2017

Trip advisor has a lot to answer for.


I really think it’s about time you went back to work. You’ve been taking this ‘ladies what lunch’ thing a bit too far. Bacon butties here, sausage sandwiches there, a little pasta at the Galleria, Panini at Hectors shed and while you’re at Dunelm you seem to like popping into Macdonald’s. Your Trip advisor rating for eateries has soared to 5,122 points as has your waist line. Restaurant level 12 isn’t something to be proud of when it’s all about the breakfasts.

The weather is changing and your soaking up the rays in the garden will be curtailed so you’ll just have to get your wet weather gear on and get gardening. It’s all very well sneaking off to the allotment but that doesn’t keep the weeds at bay. Don’t forget to complete the end of season pond clearance when you get the chance to wear your favourite waders and shower cap and I notice the leaves have started to drop already.

Don’t know what you were thinking this morning dropping into the Spiritualist church if you were expecting me to turn up you’ve got another thing coming. Serves you right for going, I saw you miming‘Jesus wants me for a Sunbeam’ followed by a bunch of people singing ‘If you’re happy and you know it clap your hands’. You didn’t stay for coffee and biscuits though, not double espresso on offer or were you rushing home for another reason.
Anyway back to school tomorrow, just make sure you stay away from the biscuit tin.

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